When people have a conversation with me and then suddenly leaves me hanging, I absolutely hate it. It’s one of my major pet peeves. If you have to go somewhere, just say “I gotta go!” or even “be right back.” Assholes.
So, about the pain July 6, 2008
I’ve been googling why I get dull pain in my arm once in a while. It affects my sleep massively. I can’t sleep comfortably at all, none of the positions really help me. I’ve tried everything, only propping my arm a bit higher helped slightly.
It seems a lot of “diagnosis” on google pinpoints to heart trouble, circulation, whatever. I’ve had chest pain before, tightness, etc, but they would go away. My mom says that I think that I’m sick when I’m actually not, it’s just all in my head. I’ve even seen doctors, but they all say that I’m fine.
I’m not so sure about that. I can’t even sleep anymore. I have raccoon eyes now. Maybe it’s just all in my head. Now pain, go away.
My arm! July 6, 2008
My arm’s still acting funky. I was driving my dad around today and I lost grip on the steering wheel. My arm went all weak like I had a stroke or something. I couldn’t grip the wheel at all with my hand. Luckily I had another hand. My bad arm still has this weird dull pain shooting up from the elbow.
I hate driving my parents around, they freak out too much and yell at me to go 55 when I’m supposed to go 65. They yell at me when I merge onto a highway. I’m deaf so they wave their hands in my face and tap my shoulder. I don’t like to look at the other person’s face when I’m driving. I must have both eyes on the road. I drive just fine, but parents drive me crazy. It forces me to yell at them to stop talking to me and to let me drive. I can’t focus with someone talking to me in the car.
If I die in an accident and my parent lives, blame them.
Life is full of little surprises July 6, 2008
I went on my facebook today and got an email from a random girl. She asked me if I’m from California because she corroborated with someone with my name. I said yes. I wasn’t aware of who she is. Her name is Gabrielle and I was trying to think of anyone named that throughout my childhood, but to no avail.
Then I went to her profile. I said HOLY SHIT! It’s the same girl who went to school with me in France. She was few years younger than me and she absolutely looked up to me. I cannot believe that I forgot all about her. She’s all grown up now and she still remembers me. I still remember the last letter I received from her and it was after 9/11. She was concerned for me and asked if I’m okay. I was no where near any of these events so yes I was fine. She got confused with my town name and Pennsylvania.
I just can’t believe it. We were penpals for only 4 years and I didn’t write that much. I wasn’t a big fan of writing. She still remembers me.
She’s all hot now and still in France. She’s studying to be a lawyer so if one of you guys mess with me, I’m going to her, bitches.
Dull pain July 6, 2008
I can’t sleep. I have extreme insomnia. I keep on turning in bed. My arm hurts and I can’t sleep on either side or a dull pain will shoot up from my elbow to shoulder.
I need sleep! No more arm pain! Sleep! Let me sleep!
the world July 6, 2008
Sometimes I feel like I’m carrying the whole world on my shoulders. I take the blame from everyone even though it wasn’t my fault. I absorb it all in and the world grows bigger and bigger. I have no problem absorbing it all in, I’ve always been the one who gets blamed my entire life. I wonder if there is a maximum size to my world. So far, it’s still growing and gets heavier on my shoulders. I am not dropping the world anytime soon because if I do, it will be disastrous.
I’m staying strong and holding it all up. Blame me for whatever, I’ll just absorb it in and move on then you’ll go away happy. Problem solved.
