I totally see the pattern now why he became into a monster. I still care deeply about him, but he won’t take my advice to heart at all. He doesn’t see it. I guess I’ll just have to let him screw up his own life. I’ll have a good life. I’ll watch him spiral down the hole and go bye bye. He didn’t heed my advice so it’s his loss really. If he’s happy, good for him but it’s for the wrong things. I will be happy on my own. I will love myself and find someone who isn’t an emotional baggage and love him successfully. I intend to be completely independent and lead a successful life. Maybe I’ll affect the world in some ways.
All five dogs kept me up all night last night so I couldn’t quite sleep. Blah, I feel so tired. I got Oreo his own traveling bag yesterday and I’m trying to help him adapt to it because he will have a long trip to New York from California next week.
Next week! Wow, I’m leaving next week already. That is if I pass my drivers test which is tomorrow. I’m a good driver so I should pass, but of course it all depends on the person who tests me and how much of an asshole he is. I’ve heard horror stories of them failing people on minor things such as forgetting to turn on your blinker. I think I’ll be nervous like crazy tomorrow and I keep on forgetting how to do the darned hand signals. I don’t know why I keep on confusing left with right, I’m retarded. I guess I’ll be practicing all day today in the area near DMV.
I’m looking forward to getting my own car next week in New York. I’m also looking forward to having my own room. I haven’t had my own room in like quite a while. Yay for school housing. I’ll also have the townhouse to myself when my roomie goes on a vacation for few weeks. I have no idea what I’ll be doing during that time. I’ll probably explore the city more, I guess. Or maybe visit a friend in Boston? The only problem is, I don’t think she can let me crash at her place and I don’t want to ask my ex to let me crash at his place at all. I don’t even want to see him, if I do… I’ll probably give him a good slap on his face for being a monster. I’m trying to move on, but my heart keeps on tugging. I know I deserve a better guy than him. Maybe I’ll just go to Harvard Square and meet all those handsome smarties ahead of time if I move to Boston after I finish school. I really like Boston, it feels like it belongs to me. Unfortunately, it belongs to my ex too so I’ll have to suck that up and hope we don’t bump into each other.
So apparently, I’m working with a famous guy again this fall. I worked with him the past spring and he wanted me for my “talents” and even asked me if I’ll be staying in Rochester this fall. I said yes and he seemed all happy about it. No wonder. He switched with my other professor to teach MY course. Just my luck. I’m definitely getting a letter of recommendation from him when I finish school. Watch my future career soar.
