I wish… July 19, 2008

I wish that I could be an amazing person. I am certainly not ordinary, but I want to be amazing. I want men to think that I’m amazing, that there’s something about me. That I’m an amazing woman because of my life stories, future goals, and the hardships I went through.

I just want to be considered an amazing person, not just someone who is not there. I don’t want to be boring, ordinary, or even a bitch that all men won’t want to date.

I know my looks are not ordinary at all. Many people have told me that I should be a supermodel due to how unique I look. I just don’t feel pretty or beautiful or even hot. I just don’t feel attractive to men except for the old ones, of course.

I want to be attractive. I don’t feel attractive at all. I never get compliments. My friends tell me that I don’t get compliments because men are too afraid to talk to me, that I’m too good to be true. I’m sure they’re just trying to make me feel better, but who knows?

I just want to be amazing to someone.

Need a new phone July 19, 2008

I need a new cell phone. My current one is literally falling apart. I’m looking at getting a Sidekick Lx, but it’s quite expensive and I’m so poor.

Any donation?

Update on implant July 19, 2008

I’m going to continue fighting for this. My audiologist will help me get the ball rolling. I don’t know why they’re giving me such a difficult time. My previous cochlear implant was 7 years old anyways so I need a freaking upgrade.

I was one of the first children in the state to get implanted. I was the FIRST one at my hospital so my old hospital provided everything for me. I was special to them, but I found out through my new audiologist that they just closed down the audiology department few weeks ago at my old hospital due to issues. It sounds like they were doing bad things, but when I was a patient there, they were really good to me. It’s unfortunate.

Gotta love having Oreo lick my feet randomly.